A parent is just another person

The day before your mother and father conceived their first child, they were just another idiot in a pair of socks. Once they conceived that child, they became idiots in socks who had sex and, depending on what they wanted, either really good or really bad luck. Once their first child was born, depending on their past in the process, they were either an idiot in socks with a lot of trauma or an idiot in socks whose life was more expensive and loud but otherwise probably not that different.

None of this makes a person a god. None of this entitles them to anything special. I come from a Native American background and while I love my culture, I instantly lose respect for anybody who tries to guilt me or others about the pain our mothers endured giving birth. Nobody asked them to give birth, most likely, and if they did, it wasn't their kids who didn't exist yet. You're not responsible for things that happened before you were born. You're responsible for your own actions and words, and that's all.

Your parents don't deserve to be put on a pedestal just for passing on their genes. If they're actually good people and actually good parents, then yes, they earn a special place of honor. But if they're neglectful, if they're abusive, that's not mitigated by the fact that they're family and you're their kid. If anything it should be all the more damning that they would mistreat their own child.

I don't want to hear any excuses about people not knowing better, either. People try to tell me my parents did the best they could. No they didn't. They knew right from wrong and they had self control, they just didn't bother exercising it unless there was an audience. In public it was all kind words and sweetness, behind closed doors it was screaming and guilt and violence and days on end of the silent treatment. I guarantee you they didn't tell anyone out there "Yeah I haven't spoken to my nine year old for 3 days because she lost her glue bottle at school. I think 3 days is long enough. Tonight I can scream at her about it until she cries, keep going for half an hour afterward, tell her the cost of glue is coming out of her allowance because I don't have money to replace her school supplies, and she will have learned. By the way, don't you just love my new dress? I spent the day at the designer outlet and bought 4 new ones." They knew it was wrong. There was no excuse.

And there is no excuse for people like these. They just don't care. They have unclean spirits in them, and you can take that literally or metaphorically, but personally I think it's actually both. They don't deserve to be worshipped or have abusive behaviors excused.

---

anonymous Home August 26, 2025 at 11:50 am 1 0