is being single

is being single and friendless seen as unnattractive? i cant count the amount of bullshit i have experienced on one hand let alone on two hands, it just seems to go on and on that if i dont put myself anywhere nobodies ever going to care anyway its not like anyones bothered to shown it they all just say shit because it makes them feel like theyre a better person but really theyre still assholes at the end of the day they only say or do shit if they themselves get a pat on the back for it. every other person i keep running into seems to be teetering on the edge of either theyre a full on narcissist or theyre just very self involved with themselves im no saying they love themselves 100% of the time but theyre on the border of being very very self absorbed. every other conversation i have if i have to exert more energy than needed i get drained like that in an instant whereas if i see someone else actually returning the effort its less tiring and im not on edge as much. but i am concerned that my lack of friendships and lack of romantic experience will do me in one day cause i personally dont see myself as being unnattractive im just normal. yet every time i mention relationship or something else along the lines of a connection with others, those around me seem to dislike it if i have any sort of outside connection. if this is what being in witness protection programme feels like then it sucks.

i know i have more i can do with myself and my life but these people around me are trying to hide me for whatever reason im not supposed to have be or do things that for instance my cousins have been able to do. but surely no one ever finds a loner to be that interesting lol. thats why i dont get why things have happened this way for me, im a nobody, just a regular plain jane person who really wouldve done well if people wasnt trying to prevent me from achieving what i would love to have achieved by now. maybe itll take me passing away for someone to realise they hadnt valued me enough but i dont even see that happening tbh. i feel trapped in this shitehole reality. yes im glad i have what i have dont get me wrong BUT i am far from happy cause i know when im happy and successful people dont like it.

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anonymous Other January 15, 2025 at 3:04 pm 0 1