i’m a witch

i feel conflicted. my boyfriend has been sweet & amazing for our six years. we have had fun moments and good times i will never forget. i just feel like sometimes he doesn’t care about me feeling good. he doesn’t eat me out, make me cum, or squeeze me and play with my hair. i guess that’s really important for me in a relationship. i want to feel seen in that way. i want passion and fiery hot love. i want him to be obsessed with me. i want romance and im just starting to think he can’t compute. he’s very logical minded and worried about the rules , worried about what others think. he did take me on a spontaneous beach trip which was incredible and fun but i don’t have money at the moment and never feel okay taking so much from him even though he says it’s ok. i feel like i want more than a mild “it’s ok” “it’s fine” ykmow? like feeling _wanted_ like my presence is not optional. i want that kind of reassurance without having to beg for it. like when we had sex last night it was awesome but he got his rocks off and rolled over and forgot about me. i almost cried lol. i was really horny and would have loved attention from him. he always just squirts some lube on and goes to town instead of making out, squeezing my body, making me feel good to get me wet like i know i can. it feels so defeating. he’s always either too tired or lazy or i come to the conclusion that he doesn’t care about me feeling good. so the acts like taking me to the beach and agreeing to go on a walk with me reluctantly, and him taking me to get breakfast don’t feel genuine. he means it from the heart but it’s the small things within, ignoring me, ignoring my deep heart full of secrets, leaving me behind when i think something is interesting, not caring what i have to say , not caring if i feel good , i hold the doors open, lift the heavy stuff while he fixes his appearance in the mirror and pretends i’m just a dog at his side that doesn’t feel or think or want. i feel so limited in my expression with him. i feel like he wants me to be someone im not and im tired of just being quiet and taking it. i’m turning 24 next month. we’ve been together since before i turned 18. i feel like my mind has changed a lot & him being hot and doing the bare minimum is not enough for me to bury who i truly am anymore. i know the familiarity of being with him every day has a grip on me. but maybe i have to let him go so he can be with someone who truly appreciates and accepts his love language like he deserves. it hurts a lot to come to this conclusion but i guess it’s a reality i have to face.

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m Funny May 19, 2025 at 12:56 pm 0 0