I feel bad about the way that I look

I’m very mad at myself for having an incurable disease and being fat. I’ve been calling the ombudsman at my health insurance company to see if my medical condition qualifies me for Metformin, Saxenda or Zepbound. I am someone who lost 31 lbs in 11 months. I’ve plateaued since February. I cannot bring myself to eat in a calorie deficit completely. The chemo wrecked my face. I’m being emotionally and financially abused on a daily basis. I feel so much stress. I want to break free from my food prison. Doctors tell me I’m taking 8-12 years off my lifespan. My BMI is currently 28.5. Yes I eat health food! So I’m not eating junk and fast food. What I realize is that food quality doesn’t matter in weight loss it’s a calorie deficit. Even if one deficit is normal for one individual of the same sex it could be excessive for another person. To eat unusually small calories consistently is super challenging. I fail every two days. One of the biggest motivators for me to attempt weight loss when I feel braver is so that doctors quit harassing me. I do need constant medical care. This means showing up to the doctor 5-10 lbs heavier than last. A lot of it is lymphatic fluid. It doesn’t matter how much health food I pack into my gullet, the weight makes me unhealthy. It’s too much calories if I am maintaining a high BMI. Honestly how can I control my weight. I’m struggling. Everyone says that I must control my hunger and appetite, which is true. Being consistently in control is too hard. I honestly need weight loss drugs.

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Fran Body October 22, 2024 at 1:14 pm 2 0