Hallucinating

Something I don’t get about people, and my clinically diagnosed mental illnesses is how people expect me to be in a traditional relationship. I have ptsd, anxiety, and depression, but for feminists that often means I’m schizo and bipolar unless I see things from their perspective. Weird how that works. Suppose all my therapy and hospital stays were hallucinations. That’d explain a lot like how volunteers out of my league supposedly liked me or how I got numbers from girls out of my league. Weird I can’t find the stuffed dog a firefighter gave me for surviving a near death accident when I was six that o had for almost 20 years before that first hospital stay. Suppose i hallucinated one of the worst events of my life, the firefighter rescue, and the hospital stay. That’s a lot to hallucinate and i didn’t know it could get that bad.

Damn.

But then you have the feminists who act like the only threat people with my mental illness provide is physical: rape, murder, etc,

In reality, it’s a lot more like the last two girls I dated and what they went through. One wasn’t even sure we were on after we agreed to because I stopped talking to her until the day of the date.

Another one moved it basically right away and I wouldn’t let her stay for more than a week regardless of what she wanted. I always left her with her stuff, all of it, but nonetheless. The last time she asked to come back I gave her a firm “no.”

So even if I’m more of an emotional threat to women than a physical one why the hell am I expected to have kids and live a traditional life? Both men and women on both sides of a political spectrum seem to have that expectation. Why? Some of you accuse me of being so out of my mind I basically make everything up in my head including this post - not just the details, but the actual physical post itself. Others just don’t like me and think im not worth the oxygen I consume for reasons beyond my control.

So what’s the point? Why shouldn’t I be able to take my money, go on long ass trips on own, and pretend I’m happy as I hallucinate all the details around me: the people, kind or not. The environment, beautiful or not. Etc.?

What difference exactly does it make to you? I especially would ask that again if you’re pro LGBT+. It would seem like at the bare minimum the same standard should apply; who I decide to love or what i decide to do in my bedroom shouldn’t make a difference. As long as im not tearing down the imaginary building with imaginary people in it because ive hallucinated everything, anyway.

And yet it does matter. Often to people id want nothing to do with, but until I decided im working for myself I couldn’t avoid. Male and female.

At least, I think I work myself, I hope I haven’t hallucinated the existence of my state government and business filings. That’d be really embarrassing given I had to move back home with my family due to job loss. But like… are these people even my family then? Maybe I’m hallucinating that too. Where do the hallucinations end when you disagree with feminists? No one knows, and there’s probably not a good solution. It’s probably like The Sorites Paradox that introduced all sorts of forms of logic/reasoning.

Maybe it’s my mental illness: the ones therapists have diagnosed me with or the ones feminists have diagnosed me with or maybe both because maybe I hallucinate everything like feminists claim. Any way, none of it makes any sense at all. Especially if no one is being harmed. If they are I wouldn’t know either way because apparently I hallucinate everything, and there’s not a good way for me to determine fact from fiction that satisfies feminist expectations.

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anonymous Dating March 27, 2026 at 7:14 am 0 0