Being a minority with disabilities is miserabke

You’ll never be good enough for anyone. It’s way harder to land and keep a job. One time during community college I applied for an IT internship. I interviewed for a fucking hour. The interviewer told me he saw the internship as a form of community service, and told me he wasn’t sure what he could teach me. He criticized me in my cover letter he never provided like personal details. I fired back an email about that. He ended up using my professor who called me a genius to find a different classmate for the internship. She emailed all of us.

It didn’t matter how hard I worked, and apparently I worked too hard. I tried for a different opportunity and was told I’d need to move to another state. Despite being an adult I could barely afford college, let alone relocation. One of the big four when I tried to get into a program they had told me to use google more.

No one gets how hard it is out here. They tell us to keep fighting and work harder. But it makes no difference. They expect us to utilize what we’re taught in CPT even when life is worthless. Not merely feels worthless, but is worthless.

My best shot at a job is to make my own video games. However, according to Google Gemini I’m going to be working hard as hell for upwards of $10,000 over the course of 3 years. That’s less than a single year of disability income. Taylor Swift probably has panties with skid marks worth more than that.

Comparison is supposedly the thief of joy, but when everyone has standards you will never meet for reasons beyond your control how do you stop the worrying? The anxiety? If it’s already severe how do you avoid letting society make it worse? You don’t.

And no one ever cares. They’ll tell you how bad they feel about you, but won’t give you help that’ll put you in a better place. They won’t treat you like a human, and they haven’t treated me like one all my life.

I had to fight racist bullies once a week for 15 years of school. It didn’t matter if I walked away. It didn’t matter if I kept my mouth shut. It didn’t matter if I talked. What mattered was I was different, and my ancestors had been here longer than theirs. What mattered was the system telling everyone were savages.

It didn’t matter I could get suspended for a week and come back and pass a test. In fact, despite missing probably half the school year for fighting every year I was in school (and yes, I was expelled a few times, eventually placed into sped, etc) I passed almost every standardized test. The only one I failed had a 96% failure rate because the teacher was that bad.

There’s no pleasing people. No one cares. No one understands. But since they claim to care about us it’s all good. Words alone are good enough. It doesn’t matter if you kick a homeless person in the head as they’re dying as long as you apologize afterwards.

You know why? Because they tried. They let that homeless person live in misery. They tried to show restraint. They feel bad an might even shed a heroic tear for the homeless person. That “effort” is what matters.

Besides even if their rich parents are rich they had to talk to another rich person to get their opportunities. Can you imagine how hard it is to talk to people? Usually rich people can just pay someone to do that for them.

Oh shit. I’ve got ptsd w/ severe anxiety and depression and spend a lot of time in bed. But I’m also poor so I don’t matter. I’m not human. Never have been.

Poor people like me should stop being wrong every opportunity we get. Even when we’re wrong. It’s embarrassing and a lack of effort that’s disgusting.

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anonymous Other February 15, 2026 at 1:43 pm 1 0