Life sucks for me right now, and people are pissed

So im currently <redacted> years old. I'm house hopping as I'm on my own right now. The people who've I've been living with all became tyrants after the first week of me living there. I clean, do chores, and keep to myself all while keeping my job. I have a loving <redacted> who's been helping me through all of this. But I'm tired of being told what to do with myself as an adult. No one has any faith in me both financially and morally. No one answers my texts and I'm always left on delivered. My plans, when I try to have fun, either have 5 bad things to come along after it or fall through last second. I'm always making someone upset with me when I'm trying to live my life. Whether it be I didn't invite them to something that didn't concern them, said something real that they don't like, or not paying everything for them or took them somewhere when I had my vehicle, someone is always upset with me. I'm very much aware they all talk shit about me behind my back. Im well aware. I'm just waiting for them to come clean with it. I'm in a bad situation and no one has given me even a tiny break. I'm always working, and being told to not go out or have a good time because I need to be saving. Then riddle me this, HOW DOES ONE PLAN ON SPENDING SO MUCH MONEY IN 1 NIGHT THAT IS BROKE?! Not me. I do not do that as I have other obligations that I have to pay before I do ANYTHING fun. Half of the time I don't have anything fun planned up other than going to a friend's house. I try to give myself one thing to look forward to that I plan with people in advance, to keep myself going. After everything I've been through, I kind of wanna leave earth now, yet only 1 person knows this. I refuse to let other people, especially those without a job and bad spending habits, tell me what to do with my money from a job I actually have and go to regularly. So if you happen to read this and get that heart sinking feeling thinking it's about you, it probably is and you should talk to me and legitimately listen. I'm fed up. I'm trying to keep my peace and you're not giving a shit and keep poking at the bear with a SHARP ASS STICK. I haven't had any time to process what has happened to me and everyone is expecting me to be completely fine and move on with it because "Thats life. It never gets easier". NEWS FLASH, IM NOT OVER IT. IVE NEVER PROCESSED IT. THINGS KEEP PILING UP, AND IM GONNA SNAP ON EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOU. I'VE HELD MY TONGUE SO MANY TIMES (Sometimes involuntary because people LOVE to interrupt and talk to me like I'm a damn child) AND IM TIRED OF IT. No, you don't actually listen. You wanna say your piece, and when I don't applaud you and say "you're right" you get upset and run away. That's kid shit. We're not kids. If we fight, we fight. Whatever I have to do to get you to fucking listen to me for once. I tried talking, giving space, apologizing, none of that is good for you except for you being right EVERY SINGLE TIME. EVEN WHEN YOU'RE NOT. At least I can admit when I fucked up. It takes an arm and a leg for you to even start admitting you messed up. No matter what I do, I always piss someone I know off. Some of y'all have never heard no before in your lives and it fucking shows, spoiled ass brat. You dont care about anyone but yourself. Its always about you. Biggest thing that should concern any of you, you espeically, I stopped crying.

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anonymous Friends June 04, 2024 at 7:43 pm 0 0