I'm such a whiny bitch

Being in middle school is shit, grown ups say it's a phase and that it's gonna go away, but it's been like this for years. I just act like everything is okay but when i finally express myself I'm being dramatic and my life is good so i don't have a right to act like that. I have to act like everything is okay but it's NOT. I'm fucking TIRED, this mask, the lies, the SAME ROUTINE. My family is full of snakes, cheating dad, parents fighting, mental abuse, manipulation, promises that are never going to happen... Mentally unstable mom that promises that she'll try to get "better" for us but she's been saying that since i was a kid. My dad is a monster, my mom is too but i can't hate her... It's not her fault. They take their anger out on me and my brothers, I try to act like it's okay but i just don't know if i can keep this up, it's getting worse, sleepless nights, over thinking, mood swings, and random episodes. I used to cut myself to feel SOMETHING or someone could notice. Now i stopped, not because i got better, but just because i don't even care anymore if anyone cares. I bottle up all of my emotions for days, weeks, or even months. And it just all releases randomly for no reason and i have all of these thoughts...i want people to care about me but when they actually ask me if I'm okay or need help i refuse. I know theres people out there that have it worse so who am i to complain about my life? I'm just being over dramatic...? I don't know. I want to talk about it to anyone but i can't, i can only do it online.

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Alice Other May 31, 2026 at 3:28 am 0 0