Why are you with him

I have to get this off my chest because every time I'm reminded I get annoyed.

My friend (F22) is dating a 34 year old man. 1st red flag.
She was single for about a month before she met this man and started a relationship with him, which right off the bat btw, he was openly against abortion, using any birth control or wearing condoms. Translation, he is against women's health care and reproductive rights. She WILLINGLY entered into a relationship with this man. Since then, he has opened up on more of his views, beliefs etc and stated that he is also openly homophobic and likes to pretend he's deeply religious despite the fact he has a teenage child out of wedlock, has done drugs and been in jail.

What is making me annoyed with my friend is that she is essentially not taking any accountability for the fact that her being in a relationship with him directly reflects on her character as well as it does on his. The fact they have had these conversations and she has participated in his homophobia and agreed to an extent, thus encouraging his awful behaviour is making me rethink my friendship with her. Theres been other red flags with this man I won't spend all day writing about but if she decides now to go down this conservative pathway purely for some male validation then really all it tells me is I have to stop being friends with her. I don't want to be associated with someone like that. And that makes me sad also because until she met this man i believed her beliefs and morals were stronger than that and more aligned with my own.

Should I have a conversation with her that I think this boyfriend is a bad influence and she should dump him? I haven't so far because i thought partially it wasn't my place to comment on her relationship and also, I dont want to insult her intelligence, its plain common sense that this man is not a match for her? I'm rethinking everything now.

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H Friends January 30, 2025 at 9:20 am 0 0