Just letting it out

I’m Roman Catholic and I love god and do my best to uphold my religion beliefs and my morals. But sometimes it’s hard. I try so hard to forgive and forget but I feel that it’s allowing others to hurt me easily. And I don’t know I’m disappointed and angry at myself. I have full faith in God and Jesus and Mary and angels, but I get embarrassed when talking about my religion to other people. I feel like I need to hide this part of myself to those around me. Oftentimes whenever I say I’m Catholic, first thing I hear is: Are you Homophobic? or God doesn’t even exist. I hate how just because of my religion all sudden people are assuming the worst of me. They all assume that I’m supper rightest and racist or homophobic. When I’m not. And I’m upset when they connect those kind of things back to my religion because God doesn’t hate. How can God ever hate his own beautiful creations? He didn’t have to create us, but he did because he wanted to. I strongly believe that everyone is free to love and be who they want to be. Except if you’re over here killing or murdering someone and over heinous acts. I remember when I kept questioning if God really send people from LGBT+ communities to hell when I younger. I grew up with everyone and the news constantly saying how it’s wrong and bad even though they were simply just loving another person? I ask my Sunday teacher (indirect ?) only to be told that God loves everyone. “Even the devil?” “Yes, even the devil.” “WHAT HOW ISNT HE BAD???? THE DEVIL IS EVIL THOUGH!!!!” “God loves everyone no matter what.” At that time I couldn’t understand. I was taught by those around me that there were only good vs bad. But now I came to realize that there’s more to us as people. We aren’t just one thing. We’re made up entirely by our experiences; a life given to us by our creator that shapes our views and morals. We all have our own definition of right versus wrong. (Like how some say pineapple pizza is gross and others like it). Perhaps the reason why God given us free will is so that we can make mistakes and learn to move past them learn the true meaning of love and life even when it hurts. Learn to embrace our differences. Learn to love what we hate. Learn to be open to what we try to hide. Learn to love one another despite our many flaws. I dunno honestly this just stated off as a rant to only end up like this soap opera cliche message. But honestly I just wish this world can be better. I know there’s good in all of us even to those who hurt me so badly and persecute me just for my religion or discriminate me for my race. I hope to better understand their views and not just simply dismiss it as being wrong and to see that they are also right as well and that I’m not some righteous person know it all and hero complex.

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anonymous Religion March 14, 2025 at 9:03 pm 0 0