Just get married to me cuz then they wont bother you anymore

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anonymous 2 weeks ago

Boy, Susan....You sure do go through the gambit of emotions, huh? Well, anyway, regardless of your culture, it's time to hit you with a solution I KNOW you won't like, but remedies are rarely painless. And you said it in your post. That one word: Disown. It happened to me, but what helped was that I was kinda abused throughout my life, escalating rapidly during my high school years, culminating into age 20 when I was unceremoniously dumped into the streets at night, homeless and hopeless for the first time, and had to fend for myself. The one thing I had going for me was my grandma endlessly chanting in my head that when all hope is lost, turn to God. I will say also that you can't get out of homelessness without God. Just impossible. But anyway, after much cajoling and convincing that I should meet my parents again from my therapist and psych, I did, and promptly regretted it. Only visited 20 times out of like 4 years before I stopped altogether. It was like I never left and that wasn't good at all. Despite much more than that but I'll leave it there, this was easier because of this happening. If they showed me some measure of love like I assume they do you, it might be impossible to disown them first and stay away from them and finally be free of everything when you get on your own two feet and be self supportive of your daily life. But that is your solution. You are your own person and the sooner they realize that, the quicker and emotionally healthier it'll be for all involved. Also, I'll assume that you may from all this want to take religion at arm's length like I did permanently. I can never trust people in a religious institution again, and will only attend for food or intersecting philanthropic deed. The core of hypocrisy is in there and being distant like that makes you way less susceptible to being that which should be feared, a hypocrite supremacized by some God whose texts you read and obey and others who don't you must somehow look down on to even treating them like the enemy. I wish you luck. On another note, it is a shame that I at least don't know the region where you're at. Only because of your description, but also slightly off kilter behavior. That's my weak sport with women. You doing curses and spells through prayer as you say makes me want to at least talk to you more, since it shows to me you have a dark side you keep inside of you except here. That realism attracts me when women emit that. To me, that's realism. Being near to the breaking point instead of hiding it and faking it, when eventually that facade will break and lead to your ruin and someone else's if God forbid it turns violent. That's anything one hides and lets fester, not yours per se. Lastly, I will say this though: 1, Don't disrespect God like that. God doesn't do curses. At least the Christian God I pray to, through Jesus. Vengeance is mine, says the Lord and I try to follow that and it does make my life easier. But He doesn't do curses. Karma comes and does final punishments and rewards on Earth. Lastly, I think you said you wished your parents, indirectly, dead. That's foul. Don't do that. At the end of the day, they gave birth to you and in their own way, love you and their heritage and everything else. Yeah, it's regressive and forceful with that arranged marriage stuff with men you don't 100% like for varying reasons, but you only have one set and that's it. I cried and nearly committed suicide when all of my family died within a few years of each other that I only got intuitions about and then looked up online to see they did die, one I believe natural, and the other one, maybe suicide. Don't know. But I almost killed myself knowing I'm 100% alone with no family. It is one of the most isolating and claustrophobic feeling ever when that reality hits. So to do what you do, I'm sorry, I must say you need to stop now or face immense regret that may push you to suicide. Take a breather and calm down, work things out. You seem to be well versed when you speak, very proper. Apply that to this because you put it out there so I can make a judgment on it along with others, and I must say that is a repulsive act that isn't influenced by God, but more so his rival, Lucifer also known as Satan. Stop praying to God for curses and accelerated death on your family. I highly doubt they deserve that, and they brought someone like you in this world who is making a contribution and being societally helpful in her own little way at minimum. Hopefully that'll get you back into focus and not accelerate that inevitable feeling because when it's magnified my guilt and regret like I mercilessly got through 24/7, albeit none of this my fault, I wouldn't wish this on anybody. DON'T GO DOWN THIS PATH AT ALL!!!! In fact, repent to God about asking him to do evil stuff and ask differently. When this happens, God only can help and save you. It is PURE torture that will torment you EVERY. WAKING. SECOND. OF. YOUR. LIFE!!!! Well, hope things get better. Nice giving you a thesis level advice here. Enjoy your sleep and pray for good things, not the dark wishes and spells. He will punish you in ways you won't be able to grasp, and this is from first hand experience.

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anonymous 2 weeks ago