Did I choose the wrong university??

I recently started grad school at * university, and I was offered a very nice assistantship. Before I started my assistantship I was very excited because I would be working in res life (an opportunity I was never given before). I also thought the city was very beautiful, despite the lack of free parking anywhere.

However, when I started my assistantship, I feel like it's been trainwreck after another. Both of my supervisors quit and left right when I started, leaving me trying to navigate being new for a couple of weeks with barely any support. On top of that, I made a bad first impression with a couple RAs on accident, and although I apologized I still feel like they all talk about me behind my back. Like I can never get a break even though I am just trying my best and learning everything, from the school culture to the job itself.

It also makes me feel bad to constantly feel like I am compared to the previous grad they had before. Which is annoying because I am not them and will never be them. But I'll hear comments that make me specifically feel bad for being new and not knowing much. I am here to learn, yet I feel like I am getting hated on for learning or not knowing things.

Anyways, it's only been week 3 and it feels like a disaster already. My first day of school I even got a parking citation and the parking office on campus is so rude. They wouldn't even appeal my ticket when it was an honest mistake. I also have heard of racist comments towards other students (particularly Asian students), and that never would have happened at my previous institution. I also feel like the staff are more individualistic in their practices which is different than what I am used to.

But I feel like at this university I can't trust anyone (literally everyone talks behind everyone backs), I am always on edge and stressed out, and I can barely stand my assistantship. I realized the university was not how I thought it was going to be. I feel like outreach really lied to me about how great of an environment it was here. Especially because after I onboarded, they were like yeah there is a lot of drama here. Like wow, thanks for telling me after I was so excited to go here and study.

I sometimes think maybe I shouldn't be here at this university, especially with everything seemingly hasn't been going my way at all, but I am wondering if I should just rough it out until I graduate. The other graduates cry almost everyday being here, so maybe I am overthinking and it's supposed to feel this awful being here.

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anonymous School September 11, 2025 at 12:09 pm 0 0