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Why am I like this now

Why am I like this now

I began dating this guy at start of 2018 and we dated for just over a year and half. After a year of dating him I accidentally cheated on him. I sometimes talked to other guys throughout our relationship, nothing flirty or anything but he still always said I was being flirty. Anyways, one time I was hanging out with my friend who was a guy and he kissed me, I didn't know what to do in the moment so I just sat there. Once it happened my friend begged me not to tell my boyfriend, and for some reason I didn't.
A few months went by and my boyfriend went to another school and his school dance was coming up and he had to take a girl from his school so him and this girl he knew I hated planned to go together. I begged him for ages to take anyone else and he finally agreed.
A week or two later he decided to dump me over text at 11:30pm.
We stayed friends for a bit, even though he decided to take that girl I hated to the dance afterall all . Then I decided to tell him about the kiss, he then called me a slut, a whore and all of the other names you can think of and I haven't spoken to him since.
That was around 6 months ago. Ever since then I have gotten with sooo many guys and I honestly don't know why. I think at first it was to make him jealous but now I don't know why I do. I think now people kind of know me as that girl who "gets around" so I feel like I don't have a choice I just have to live up to that and give the guys what they want. I just don't know arggh

Steph Dating February 25, 2020 at 4:37 am 1
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3 Rant Comments
Reputations suck! And if you don't want to be seen that way you don't have to live up to it; not that it matters that much any way.

Most relationships don't really matter: most relationships do far more harm to all of us than good. We tend to figure out which were important well after the fact

But with a poor reputation and a disinterest to change you could be poisoning your future; to spite your past? Breakups suck but alley-catting around really would just make you easier to get over, and mess up how everyone sees you.
Socrates 1 month ago
lol so your just a sheep then? choosing to follow what everybody says about you, and choosing to do what guys now expect of you..
let me tell you something.. IF you choose to get around, let it be because you will it. not because ppl now expect that from you.
if it were me though, id change my ways.. turn down the next 10 guys.. then stay with one that hits home for you..
thats just me.. i generally swim against the flow. when ppl think they figured me out.. i change direction and find a different stream to swim up.

socrates is on point too, if and when you try to be serious and if your partner knows of your now recent past it will make it easier for them to drop you. lets say this is the fella that hits home too, your going to hurt pretty bad at how easy they moved on and probably fall harder than this last one that hurt you.
aristotle 1 month ago
Sounds like you just need approval. Slutting yourself out won't help your self esteem even though it feels like it should. If you're free tonight and could go for a good shagging just send your phone number. Expect to swallow :)
Ranter 1 month ago
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