My whole life I always lived by the "treat others how you want to be treated" mantra. I don't know much about my dad but one of the only things I DO know is that dad was someone who would go out of his way to make birthdays a week-long event for anybody he knew, and I took after him with doing this. I love getting people super sentimental gifts and I typically shop months in advance to make their birthdays special.
It never bothered me that I never got anything in return for my birthdays up until recently.
I have the same birthday as an in-law of mine and I'm always ignored for her birthdays. They typically forget unless I bring mine up.
She has massive, elaborate birthdays where she gets thousands of dollars in gifts, new cars, private venue, expensive restaurant, ect--the most expensive thing I've ever gotten was a shirt that was 3x my size (I wear a medium-large, and they got me a 4xl shirt) and a half-used gift card for a place I never go to eat (yes, already used, $50 gift card with $4.32 left on it, they told me they used most of it but "thought I'd like it"). They typically get me cheap stuff from walmart that I don't actually need and know that I don't like and wouldn't use, and while I would appreciate anything, it's stuff like bags of chips or socks. It's hurtful, especially when I spend so much time and effort and money on these people. I've explicitly stated I appreciate gifts but I don't need them if they're just randomly grabbed because they don't know what to get me, I'd rather people save their money if that's the case.
I hate sounding ungrateful but it just hurts my feelings so much. After 17 years of doing this I'm just very tired. My husband is already buying things for his family's birthdays but seems to have forgotten mine already as well. It makes me so sad. I think I'm going to give up on making people happy. anonymousOther January 15, 2022 at 5:01 am30