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I h8 my life

I h8 my life

I think me skipping class and not passing government/econ the 1st time around was the 1st mistake and the very beginning of my downfall in life. Last year of 2021-2022 I was at a High School up in Carrollton-Plano area. Very nice school, although I hated it there. My 1st semester was alright, but when I got to the 2nd, I started making terrible choices. At the time I was working at an extremely dead mall for Journeys getting paid minimum wage. Most the time I had to walk to work which took almost an hour from my school. It was a good thing I got out of school early. I did have a pretty big group of friends that year though. They would take me sometimes, so I wouldn't have to walk. Now let's get back to me in school. My classes were Food Science, English 4, Government/Econ, and senior out. I was doing good in Food Science and English, but not my Gov/Econ class. I don't remember what got to me when I started to skip more and more. Especially after finding out how I could skip without them notifying my mom. That was probably a big part into it. I never once skipped until my senior year. Worst mistake to do it my senior year. I started to skip and miss out on so much work for all my classes. There was even a time where I lied about having COVID, so they could excuse my 2 weeks absence. It was hard to bring up my grade and get work done from the days I missed. I wouldn't do anything, but go to work. That brings me to when I met my boyfriend for the 1st time. One day I came to work after school to see that there were 2 completely different employees that I've never seen at the store before. One was my bf Austin, the other was a girl named Addy. I didn't like Addy whatsoever. Austin and I got along very quickly though, which made me very fond of him. We messed around in the back of the store to make work fun. Later in my shift, Addy told me that I would probably have to close with them since this other girl seemed as if she wasn't going to come in. In my head, I was like hell no. Originally my friends were going to pick me up from my shift after to hang out, but ended up staying to close and Austin would take me home. Now let me tell you guys one more thing that was going on. I was talking to my ex. It was around December when I was talking to my ex and when I met Austin at my job. When Austin took me home, he kissed me and I wasn't mad. I got all excited when I was home. I had also asked for his snap before we left the store. Eventually my ex found out right on New years and that was done with. The 2nd semester started and found out Austin was going to be our new store manager since we didn't have one anymore. We got a lot closer after that. Then around that time, that's when I started skipping class then just missing a whole day then a whole week or 2. I really screwed my life up. Later around April I found out I was pregnant by Austin. We started dating April 5th. I eventually had moved in with him one day and eventually dropped out of my school to go to the school next to his home. I found out it was too late for me to transfer. My mom did get mad when she found out about everything (besides the pregnancy). Then eventually Austin's family realized I had moved in and wasn't just sleeping over a lot. I had lost my job at Journeys not so long after. Reason was because Austin and I were employees dating and another employee snitched. It definitely came back to bite them because Austin had helped that employee out by hiring their ex or whatever they were because they needed the money. That lead to me just quitting and the other employee had moved to another store. They both eventually quit together. Austin then was struggling because of low staffed extremely. I would secretly come to work with him but hide in the back. When things got really hard, he almost quit till the higher district manager asked if he just wanted to come back to the original Journeys he was working at before. He gladly accepted it. I eventually got a new job over at that mall getting paid a lot more than I ever have at an other job. Here I am still pregnant, transferred at another school with the same job. School was easy at first till today when my counselor told me that I had to finish all my classes within mid October or even earlier. My family besides my sister and dad (seperated from my mom) still doesn't know I'm pregnant and 6 months already in. Neither does his family. Everything is really hard. Austin already has a son and has to deal with the mom who isn't even there. Then I'm somewhat responsible for him now since I'm with Austin. Then I'm having to be more responsible at the house since I moved in. Then school is just hard af now. I don't even know if finishing by mid October is even possible, but we'll see. Then having to tell family about my pregnancy is just as bad. Everything about my life is crumbling down. Austin and I don't even like our jobs right now. Then I'm having to pay my medical bills for the one hospital trip I made for a UTI. Then I also found out we aren't able to move past certain counties or it'd be considered kidnapping because of the son. College is just getting harder to think about now too. I'm going broke especially having to take care of a child that we have no money or room or time for. Having a baby was the last thing I wanted in life, but here I am. I'm living my worst nightmare right now. I don't know what to do. I'm just slowly getting tired of my life now. It get worse little by little. I wish I could start my life all over again. ugh:/
beanz Other September 23, 2022 at 4:21 pm 0
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