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coming out suspected crush s and distant friends

coming out suspected crush s and distant friends

I'm giving no context for any of this btw lmao


so I figured once I’m more comfortable with how jay might react (we’ve only been friends for about 2 weeks)I’m just gonna causally come out as trans to him a my school is very old fashioned and still worried how people might react-this plan has been going pretty well and he seems pretty chill with the idea of trans people but today I was eating lunch with Jay and another boy (who I’m gonna call Kyle)Me and jay are casually talking and Jay suddenly starts acting odd-he starting basically mimicking me and laughing at everything I say/laugh at (like if I laugh and cover my mouth-he'll do the same even if he doesn't know what I'm laughing at)at ,getting really close/touchy,giving me his food,literally took a bite out of A pizza crust I had already half ate to joking get him to stop asking,etc.Jay is laughing with with me over something and Kyle suddenly goes dead silent and serious (very unlike him) with a "wait-a-f*cking-minute" look on his face goes turns to me and goes “you realize Jay has a crush on you,right?”not even in a gossipy "omg-he likes you"way but just blunt, matter-of-fact"Jay has a crush on you".this is not only horrifying because I’m friends with Jay and don’t really like him back but now I have to tell him the girl he supposedly likes is actually thinking about being a boy-jay is present for this and nervously laughs but doesn't deny it-kyle stays quiet an i get the vibe that this a very known and even talked about topic between them. i don't want to seem stuck up and assume that Jay is in love with me just because of what Kyle said and I can't really ask him I can't just be like"hey, jay-i know we barely know each other-but do you love me?im also thinking about becoming a boy by the way" -I have no idea how I'm supposed to handle this-there are some hints I have to Jay liking me, for example his friend group expect for Kyle has been very "out-of-touch" with me-i used to be very connected with them, but now they have stopped talking to me and have gotten very distant , alot of times when I go up to jay, they all stand in silence around him and watch us talk-while Jay is becoming the opposite, constantly trying to talk to me and being very physically close (grabbing my wrist, putting his arm around my shoulder, etc) my other friend who I'm gonna call Jacob was also sort of distant today-acting sort of awakwerd at the start of class (he soon got over it but i digress). I feel so confused and conflicted on what I should do-i never planned on coming out to Jay untill I know for sure he would hate me but now there's a possibility that his affection is on the line-i know that if Kyle is right and Jay does truly love me,it's sort of my job to tell him I'm thinking about being a trans-male but I'm not just quite ready to come out-this is so frustrating.
wtf School September 22, 2022 at 7:15 pm 0
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Btw I came out to him today!I still don’t know if he likes me but he was definitely cool with me being possibly trans!!!
Writer of this rant 1 week ago
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